Shall Not Be Infringed (Unless You’re Buying Kale)
You know what grinds my gears? Stores that post signs saying “No Firearms Allowed.”
Trader Joe’s, I’m talking to you.
Sprouts? You too, you patchouli-scented panic factory.
I have a concealed carry permit. I carry legally. Responsibly. And you’re telling me I’m not allowed to protect myself in your store—but also, I can’t leave my weapon in my fucking saddlebag either. Because if I do and some homeless asshole steals it, then your anti-gun crowd gets to label me irresponsible, dangerous, a walking liability.
See the problem?
It’s a setup. A trap. And it’s bullshit.
You post those signs in obscure corners of your entryway where no one actually looks, and suddenly I’m committing a felony because I didn’t spot a 3x5 placard half-covered in holiday hours and a coupon for vegan jerky. And let’s not ignore the fact that we don’t do this with any other constitutionally-protected liberty.
There are no signs that say:
“No Religious Thought Beyond This Point.”
“Freedom of Speech Suspended While Shopping.”
“Assembly-Free Zone.”
“Must Be Willing to Quarter Troops to Enter These Hallowed Fucking Grounds.”
You’d lose your mind if you saw that. But slap up a no guns allowed sign and suddenly people act like it’s a moral flex. Like you’ve made the world safer.
News flash: you didn’t.
Banning guns in Trader Joe’s doesn’t keep anyone safe. Neither does locking your doors in the parking lot and peeking over your shoulder while clutching your canvas bag of kale and trauma. It’s theater. Security theater.
I carry a gun to protect myself. Period.
I'm transgender. I ride a motorcycle. And let’s be honest—northern New Mexico isn’t exactly immune to crime or hate. The world’s a beautiful place, but it’s not always kind. I don't have a detail of armed guards. I am my armed guard.
You don’t get to restrict my god-given right to defend my life or my property because you have feelings about it. America wasn’t built on feelings. It was built on freedom—and the responsibility that comes with it.
What I see today is a society obsessed with farming out safety to the government. Call the cops. Let the state handle it. Let someone else carry the weight. And then you wonder why you feel powerless.
So yeah, I carry. And no, I won’t shop at your store.
Not because I’m boycotting you—but because you made it clear that you don’t trust me to keep myself safe.
And frankly?
If you don’t trust me in your store,
I don’t trust you with my money.
