A Trail of Lipstick Smears and Corporate Mediocrity
Corporate America has a fucking problem. We've gotten remarkably good at promoting people who look successful without ever accomplishing a goddamned thing. A trail of lipstick smears and political connections has replaced competence, integrity, and accountability. Meanwhile, the people actually doing the work are left wondering how the fuck we're supposed to accomplish the mission. Is the workforce getting worse, or have I finally climbed high enough to see the corporate bullshit that's always been there?
You Can Take Us Out of the Military …
Three former military people show up fifteen minutes early to a meeting, immediately look for seats facing the door, and somehow end up comparing photographs of horrific motorcycle injuries. And none of us thinks there's anything particularly unusual about it. Military service leaves its mark long after you take off the uniform. It shapes how you communicate, how you approach responsibility, and how you understand accountability. We show up early, we tell the fucking truth, and we don't waste time dressing things up in pretty language.
Don't Let Your Day Fuck Up Your Night
Some weeks, the weight of leadership, bad decisions, and life's bullshit gets pretty fucking heavy. But when I walk through the door at night, I don't want to dump that weight on the woman I love. Life has taught me how precious those ordinary evenings really are, and I'm not about to let somebody else's bullshit steal them.
I Earned That Fucking Picture
Someone at work told me the picture I submitted was too unprofessional and suggested I replace it with one that’s a fucking decade old. Nope. I don’t look like that woman anymore. I’ve aged, changed, died, survived, learned, led, and earned every fucking stripe on my shoulder. The woman in this picture is the woman you asked for.
Someone in My Corner
I thought this week’s lesson was going to be about surviving a new leadership role, monsoon commutes, and a shitty rear tire. Instead, I walked into the garage and found a clean motorcycle—and another reminder that I don’t have to do this fucking life alone anymore.
Apparently, Talking Isn't Always Helping
I fucking love this woman, and when she's frustrated, every instinct inside me wants to fix things. Turns out, sometimes helping isn't solving. Sometimes helping isn't talking. Sometimes helping is finding some shade, drinking some fucking water, and shutting the hell up. Apparently, loving someone means learning that too.
The Burden
Leadership isn't the meetings, the title, or the authority. It's the weight you carry home after everyone else has gone to bed. Four years after my cardiac arrests, sleep still eludes me, and on nights like this, I find myself lying awake, replaying conversations, questioning decisions, and worrying about people I'm not even empowered to help. That's the burden nobody tells you about.
Naked
Why is it easier for us to get naked than it is to tell someone how we actually feel? Somewhere along the way, we've convinced ourselves that exposing our hearts is more dangerous than exposing our bodies. Maybe it's time we started having the hard conversations before we need a bottle of whiskey to find the courage.
The Loudest Guy in the Room
Sometimes the loudest guy in the room isn't the smartest. He's just the one who can't stand being ignored. After one too many encounters with men who mistake ego for competence, I found myself wondering why confidence so often replaces capability, and why the people worth listening to rarely have to raise their voices.
False Urgency
Sometimes the most dangerous thing on the road isn't speed, bad weather, or distracted drivers. Sometimes it's the pressure we create in our own heads. One embarrassing mistake at a security checkpoint and one terrifying moment on the ride home reminded me that rushing to save a few seconds can cost you a whole lot more.
I Came Back
You spend years building a career, convinced that one day you'll finally earn a seat at the table. Then one morning you realize you've been standing outside the conference room the whole time.
I left an organization years ago because I believed it had become a good old boys club. Fifteen years later, I came back believing it had changed. This is the story of what happens when the place you wanted to finish your career starts feeling painfully familiar again.
The Cost of Saying No
Sometimes leadership isn't about saying yes. Sometimes it's about standing in a room full of people who have already committed themselves to a mistake and having the courage to say no. Not because it's popular. Not because it's politically advantageous. Because it’s the right thing to do.
Twenty-Five Years Later
Twenty-five years after walking through the doors of this institution, I found myself sitting in a leadership class for first-time managers, raising my hand just to remind people I existed. It wasn't the training that bothered me. It wasn't even being overlooked. It was the realization that after decades of service, battles fought, and lessons learned the hard way, I'm still standing in the same place saying, "Excuse me, I'm over here." Maybe that's the lesson. Maybe after twenty-five years, it's finally time to stop asking for a seat at the table and build a new one.
The Bravest Thing I Haven’t Done
For twenty-five years, I've fought battles at work, protected my team, challenged bad decisions, and pushed back against corporate nonsense. But lately I've realized something uncomfortable: the bravest thing I may ever do isn't standing my ground. It might be walking away.
They Should Walk Away Knowing They Mattered
There’s a moment in every project when it stops being an idea and becomes real. Not in some abstract way, but in that gut-level, holy shit this is actually happening way. That moment hit me this week when I opened the first full proof of A Survivor’s Guide to Survival.
Hurry Up and Lead
I showed up to the airport way too early, thinking I was being smart. Turns out, I just bought myself a front-row seat to human behavior, and a reminder of what real leadership actually looks like.
Tonight, That Is Enough
For years, I was overlooked. But not now. And maybe that timing wasn’t a mistake. Maybe I was meant to be here, with these people, at this exact moment.
1:00 a.m. Courage
There’s a certain kind of courage that only shows up at 1:00 a.m., usually soaked in alcohol and aimed in the wrong direction. This is a story about commitment, accountability, and what actually matters when your life is on the line.
When You Start Questioning Your Own Mind
I wasn’t crying because of pressure. I deal with pressure every day. I was crying because, for a moment, I thought my mind was broken and I didn’t know if I could trust myself anymore.
The Long Way Around Ego
I lost my temper at a Harley service counter over a warranty repair. I wasn’t wrong to be frustrated, but I didn’t love who I was in that moment. Sometimes humility takes the long way around, but it usually gets there.